i paid $150 for this textbook
Better than 50 Shades of Grey.
Ok before I realized this was about an octopus…..that was the most terrifyingly disturbing thing I had ever read.
I STARTED LAUGHING WHEN THE MAN HAD FIVE ARMS AND HAVEN’T STOPPED YET
my blog is too much randomized anger and roaring here is octopus sex
I thought the “anothers” were talking about caresses and I thought that tthis was the american sex education system until I reached the bit explicitly saying they were octopuses.
(Source: magnezone, via tooyu)
eyyyy so this part 1 of a commission for a super cool person whose girlfriend came up with an A+ AU, lemme just copypaste the summary of it mmyes
"1930s Gravity Falls AU where Uncle Stan’s a bootlegger who runs a still, and maybe a moldy little sideshow as well. When the kids move in one summer he soon has them running rum all through the valley (vintage car chases with the deputies optional, but encouraged) and in their spare time, they investigate all the usual bizarre goings-on in Gravity Falls. She also thought maybe Li’l Gideon would be some kind of tent revival preacher boy, whom Mabel kept having to fend off."
I AM SO ON BOARD WITH THIS
this was so much fun and there’s more to come yeayeayea
Anonymous said: Hey stoned, there is this guy I really like on my bus and we sit together sometimes and my friend knows him and says he's cool, but we don't talk. How do I become friends with this guy?? (Force him into friendship)
Well, you guys already sit together. Ask him if he plays the drums. Whether he answers yes or no, say he looks like a drummer, or maybe a guitarist. He may be flattered, which would be ideal, but he may also not know what to say and get nervous. Tell him it’s just because he has big hands. Touch his hand. Slide your fingers beneath his skin until you reach the tender underside of his forearm. Rip off his flesh and eat it to strengthen your kagune. Be the catalyst of the new world order.